This One's For All The Crazy Baseball Moms!

There is a nasty rumor going around the travel baseball community.  I know it's always best to ignore rumors and go straight to the source for the truth, but why give up all that delicious drama, right?  The latest rumor is...Baseball Moms are Crazy.  Personally,  I find that incredibly hard to believe!  Moms...Crazy?  Whatever.  

But in the interest of good journalism, I thought I might dig a little deeper and see if I could uncover the reason for such a false accusation.


I have a unique perspective on the label, crazy.  I think my friend, Michelle, started introducing me as "Crazy Sheri" years ago and the nickname stuck like pine tar to a baseball bat.  Now, almost all of my baseball mom friends use that nickname when referencing me. Thanks Michelle! I need to add there are varying degrees of crazy, from harmless to certifiable.  What follows is a compilation of characteristics associated with the so called Crazy Baseball Mom rumor. None of the following case studies are aimed at a specific crazy, baseball mom. However, names have been changed to protect the innocent. 

The Clueless Mom

Everyone knows at least one Clueless Mom.  This is the mom you can't say anything bad about. She is the salt of the earth, always cheerful and kind to everyone.  Clueless Mom is the one Sarcastic Mom makes fun of,  to her face, and Clueless Mom never notices.  She'll invite your son to spend the weekend with her son. She'll bake cookies and take them swimming. Clueless Mom is the first to organize fundraisers or make car magnets to display team spirit! She is at the game to cheer for, not only her son, but the entire team.  She sits in the bleachers, alone with her book.  While reading she tries to keep up with the game, which doesn't always work.  Clueless Mom is the one you'll hear cheerfully yell to her team, "Turn Two Warriors!" Unfortunately, the Warriors are up to bat...not in the field.  Oh well, back to her Harlequin Romance novel until half time when she can bring the cookies and Gatorade into the huddle for the boys.

The Back Seat Driver, Mom

Every team has the Back Seat Driver, Mom.  In the beginning of the season, she is in the center of it all.  By the end of the season, she is sitting alone having forced the rest of the moms to clear away. Why? Because of the never ending stream of helpful coaching tips she yells throughout the game.  These tips aren't reserved for her son alone, she is happy to help coach your son from the stands, too.  Most of the time the tips come after an error is made.  For instance, when the right fielder drops a routine fly ball he can benefit from the words, "You Gotta Catch That" ringing out from the stands.  Perhaps your son is a pitcher and has walked a batter or two.  It's not unusual for Back Seat Driver Mom to offer such wisdom as, "Throw a Strike" from her lawn chair.  Of course, the occasional "Hit the Ball" is always welcome after your son strikes out.  Usually Back Seat Driver Mom is just as hard on her son as she is on yours. However, your son is off limits and that's why you're sitting on the opposing team's side of the field.  You are keenly aware of two things. One,  you're capable of doing something inappropriate at the baseball field. Two, your friends don't have enough money to bail you out of jail.  

The High Maintenance Mom

Put together and center of the baseball universe, High Maintenance Mom is a handful!  You will never find High Maintenance Mom wearing an old t-shirt or sloppy looking attire. She's bringing sexy back in her tiny tennis skirt, designer sundress or athletic jogging ensemble.  Of course, the rest of us are either jealous or don't care enough to doll ourselves up for a baseball game.  When team t-shirts are ordered, High Maintenance Mom won't like the material, the color or the style.  Forget about a cheap hotel, it's the Hilton or nothing for her! And  when it comes to her son, she will make sure you know exactly where he should play and how good he really is.  High Maintenance Mom needs to sit as far away from this next mom as she can.

The Sarcastic Mom

Love her or hate her, it's hard to ignore the Sarcastic Mom.  You never know what she'll say or when she'll say it because Sarcastic Mom lacks a filter most people possess.  She's the one who says, out loud, what everyone is thinking.  There's always witty banter between Sarcastic Mom and the players, especially when they come up to bat.  Beware when you ask Sarcastic Mom a question, she only knows one way to answer and you may not like what she has to say. You always know where you stand with Sarcastic Mom, because she isn't shy about telling you. Sarcastic Mom doesn't play well with others, you'll usually find her with the other Sarcastic Moms, they travel in packs.  Back Seat Driver and High Maintenance Mom are not easily tolerated by Sarcastic Mom. And Clueless Mom, well she's to busy reading her book to know the difference.  

Are you self diagnosing your Crazy Mom category? Fear not, most of us can identify with some or all of these Crazy Mom tendencies.   I can blame Crazy Baseball Mom syndrome on one thing, our sons. Yep, if it wasn't for them,  none of us would be dealing with this illness.  We would be spending our weekends shopping or relaxing after a hard week. We would spend our money on whatever we want instead of baseball bats and sliding shorts.  We would take a flipping vacation that didn't involve baseball once in a while. Most of all,  we would have our sanity!  But, because we love our sons we have been thrown into the world of travel baseball,  the number one cause of all this craziness.  As of right now, there is no cure.  I can only hope someone takes up our cause.  Maybe a Clueless Mom will  organize a fundraiser for research.

Caught In a Run Down. Are Travel Teams Really Eroding Community Baseball?

I stumbled upon the article, Stealing Home: How Travel Teams Are Eroding Community Baseball, by former Chicago Tribune reporter, David Mendell.  Having grown up in Chicago and, because of my obsession with travel baseball, I thought I'd give it a glance.

Mendell tells a quick story of how, while coaching his son's baseball team, he hears a booming voice from behind speak the words every parent longs to hear, "You got a nice little ball player there."  

Flattery Will Get You Everywhere

At one time or another, every parent with a kid on a travel baseball team has heard something along those lines from a coach.  If you have, he was interested in adding your son to his team roster.  I remember the first time I witnessed it happening with my son. Coach Jeff Hawn, a LEGEND in the Knoxville baseball community, approached us at Ryder's football game.  Let me repeat that, a FOOTBALL game.  Not only did the Coach express his interest in having our son on his new travel team, he made a point of coming to a football game to do it.  

Coach Hawn also saw something in a pitcher from Loudon County. Cam Hope was playing in a recreational league when the Coach plucked him out of obscurity and added him to his roster. 

Throughout the next several years, I watched Coach recruit players. I also watched parents ask, no beg, him to let their son play on one of his teams. You see, Coach has an eye for good ball players and most of the time, he's right. 

It's flattering to have a coach believe your kid is good enough to play at a 'higher' level.  When Coach approached us, our son was ten years old and Cam was eleven.  When Mendell heard the voice in Chicago, he coached a nine year old team.  

I'd like to say I was appalled by the idea of young children being recruited to play at a higher level. I wish I could have mustered up some self righteous rant about ruining my son's childhood.  Instead we put our son into Coach's hands and played with him for several seasons.  

The years with the Coach were some of the best we've had in baseball.  Ryder, and his buddy Cam, were the best 1-2 punch in town, with Cam starting and Ryder closing. The teams did well in Cooperstown, local and major tournaments. However, looking back with a more objective lens,  I wonder if  it was as rosy as I thought. 

Winning Is Everything

My mom likes to say, "It's always fun when you're winning!"  But what about when you're losing? What happens when the stress of being on a travel team gets bigger than a nine or ten year old can handle? These kids MUST experience a higher level of stress than kids playing on a little league or rec team.  Winning becomes the goal on travel teams.  Development takes a back seat and buckled up beside him, is Fun. 

Travel baseball implies a 'win at all costs' mentality.  Local tournaments are the worst for ELITE teams because local baseball teams are the very ones they MUST beat!  Losing means suffering the humiliation after the game or  Monday at school lunch tables. Worst of all, the parents of these 'higher level' players expect a lot more out of their kids.  Travel baseball is very expensive. Parent's expect a payback for their sacrifices when they are hiring coaches, traveling to other cities and living out of suitcases every weekend. There is also internal competition on a travel team. Each player competes against his own teammate to be the best. Parents also want their kid to be the best, bat high in the line up or be the starting pitcher. I am sure winning is fun for the kids, but does the end justify the means?  Does the added stress, extra practice and pressure allow the game to be fun? Or is fun ancillary compared to better competition and higher baseball IQ?

Ice Packs and Advil 

I also agree with Mendell when he points out the physical costs incurred by travel baseball players.  I remember one parent made his son throw 100 pitches a day to get ready for the weekend tournaments.  Regardless of how many times he was told NOT to overwork his son's arm, he didn't listen. Tommy John surgery is becoming an epidemic among MLB players and everything points to over use at a young age.  It's not strictly a pitcher's problem.  Young players are practicing year round and in some parts of the country, playing year round.  It's okay to assume young kids can bounce back quickly from physical activity, but playing four to six games a weekend, sleeping in hotel rooms and  three hour car rides home, exhausts a kid. Parents need to be aware of the toll travel baseball takes on their sons.  The 100 pitch parent ended up damaging his son's arm and he couldn't throw for a year.   What did the parent do? He hired a coach to teach his son how to pitch left handed.  Ice packs and Advil can't fix everything. 

Is Erosion Real?

When travel teams dominate a community,  solid baseball teams become extinct, much like present day college basketball teams with the 'one and done' movement.  The travel ball players are taken from other teams to form ELITE teams.  In this respect, the community does suffer.  The days of  'fun' being the focus, are gone.  The teams built for dominance don't want to play locally and the teams built for fun and development struggle to find tournaments.   I have heard stories about the Golden Days of Knoxville Baseball. Coach Hawn talks about the great teams of years ago and how the pool of talented players was much deeper.  Was that because those players developed a more comprehensive skill set before they joined a travel team or perhaps the travel ball system wasn't the out of control machine it is today? 

My son is 14 this year.  This season is unlike any before it.  After being asked to play on an ELITE team, he ultimately decided to play for  two teams. The coaches have his back and protect him. His teammates make him laugh and are behind him 100%. These teams play good competition and practice often, but they've found a way to stay loose and enjoy the game.

The grind will start again in high school and the quest for a college scholarship will take center stage. Sometimes it feels like being caught in a run down each time my son chooses a new team. Travel baseball can be stressful, but if you get a big enough lead...a good enough jump...you may end up scoring and finding just the right team.  


Stealing Home: How Travel Teams Are Eroding Community Baseball, http://wapo.st/1m3i19U via @washingtonpost By David Mendell

Sheri Super is a Realtor in Knoxville, TN, an Avid Baseball Fan and Ryder's Mom.